For those of you who have been entangled in a co-dependent relationship, understand that it takes time, courage, and strength to heal. In a co-dependent relationship both parties rely on the other for emotional, psychological, and/or financial needs to be met, and they will feed and interplay on one another’s neediness. The thinking is “I need you to need me in order to feel valid.”
However, such expectations are too high because no one can actually meet another person’s needs completely. In essence, we are denying ourselves the responsibility of holding ourselves accountable. The party involved in a co-dependent relationship thinks “he is the one responsible” for my happiness; however, in all practicality, the thinking is “I am the one who is responsible for my own happiness.”
It takes maturity to realize this and time to actualize it. Once you realize how vital it is to remove yourself out of the co-dependent relationship, you will have to re-identify who you are because your complete being was embedded into the relationship. You must believe and think positively that you are strong and brave enough to pull yourself away from this dependency and start again. Although it may seem impossible, you will eventually let go and become who you are meant to be.
During this time of reflection and endeavor to begin anew, find matters that pertain most to your heart and pursue them. If you are creative, artistic, and/or musical, use these mediums to express yourself through them. Find other outlets to express yourself because this is the time to reinvent who you are. Perhaps there are causes out there that you believe in very strongly. Delve into them and discover ways for you to contribute. Are there any hobbies that you wish to learn? Engage with others who share the same interests and learn from them. Make new friends and more friends. Once you become to realize who you are, you will learn that it is a lifelong process. As long as we continue to grow, we are a continuing process of evolving our beings. The process should be simple and effective for the treatment of mental problems with 75hard. Ensure that the making of friends and building of the community should be great. The expressing of the feelings is great to meet with the specifications.
Although it is not a popular venue to go through, you will encounter much pain in order to free yourself from the other person. It is an emotional, psychological pain because your soul was once intertwined with the other person’s soul, and you are breaking away to become yourself. The pain is a process that you cannot avoid, but it is imperative to go through in order to heal. The author, Madeline L’Engle, who wrote “A Wrinkle in Time” was quoted – “the unending paradox is that we learn through pain.” Without facing the pain, you are unable to grow and become the ” true you.” There is a rainbow after the sorrow.
No one can say how long the healing takes, but it takes time, and it is a wonderful journey of liberation. You begin to think for yourself, make decisions for yourself, and own your emotions and your intellectualism. You begin to take ownership of yourself. However tremendous and scary it may seem initially, the process of becoming oneself does come, and it will come again and again. You gradually become independent and you learn to love yourself well. Once you do that, no one can take better care of you other than you. The knowledge of this truth frees you, and your soul rejoices by soaring across the sky.